Horsham · in person in Hove or online
Couples therapy and relationship counselling for Horsham
When the two of you can no longer talk without it turning into the same old fight, or have stopped talking much at all, couples counselling gives you time with someone neutral. I see Horsham couples in Hove or by secure video, together or one partner on their own.
The practical facts for Horsham
- Where sessions happen
- A private room at Intergen House, 65-67 Western Road, Hove BN3 2JQ, or secure video.
- From Horsham by car
- About 36 minutes with clear roads (23.4 miles); longer at busy times.
- By train
- From Horsham, change at Three Bridges for trains towards Brighton and Hove.
- Free NHS talking therapy (for one of you)
- NHS West Sussex Talking Therapies – North Team, 01403 620434
- Fees
- £80 for 60 minutes, £100 for 90, £120 for 120. The first 15-minute call is free.
- Registration
- BACP registered member, no. 109340 (check the register); UKCP student member in advanced psychotherapy training.
Two diaries, one house and the school run
Horsham is a commuter town, and a relationship here can end up running on logistics.
One of you is on an early train to London Victoria or out to Gatwick, while the other does drop-offs in Roffey or Littlehaven and fits work around them. Weekends can fill up with errands in town and other people's plans. It's easy to become a very efficient team that no longer feels like a couple. The strain might show when children reach the Collyer's years and need you differently, or when they leave and the house goes quiet. It might come with a redundancy, a parent who needs care, or an affair that has come to light. If you know people through school and work in Horsham, you may not want to be seen walking through a counsellor's door together, and meeting outside the town can feel more private.
What happens when you come as a couple
Each of you gets equal time to speak, and if one voice starts to drown out the other, mine included, I'll say so. Early on I ask how you met, what has worked between you, and when things started to feel different, because the history matters as much as the latest argument. Then we slow down the moments that go wrong. Arguments between two people can settle into a sequence, where one presses and the other withdraws, or both go on the attack, and it helps to be able to see that sequence together. For a Horsham couple, that sequence can get tangled up with timetables. If one of you commutes to London or Gatwick while the other holds the fort in town, each can come to believe the other has the easier life, and a row about a missed pickup from Collyer's can end up carrying a week of resentment. We separate the logistics from the hurt underneath, so each of you can say what you're missing without it landing as blame. If there has been a betrayal, we don't hurry forgiveness. If one of you is unsure whether to stay, we can work with that honestly too. You can also start on your own if your partner isn't ready, and bring them in later if that feels right to you both.
Where Horsham couples can snag
One on the train, one at home
One of you on the train to London Victoria or out at Gatwick, the other doing drop-offs in Roffey or Littlehaven, and affection quietly slipping off the list.
After the Collyer's years
When the youngest finishes sixth form at Collyer's and moves on, a quieter house can show how far apart you have grown, or how little you know each other now.
A partner's drinking
When drink has become the third presence in the room. Horsham District Wellbeing offers free alcohol reduction support for the one drinking, and couples sessions can run alongside it.
Privacy in a market town
Knowing people through schools, clubs and the shops around the Carfax, and not wanting to be seen walking through a counsellor's door together in town.
If you are afraid of your partner
Couples counselling is not safe or suitable where one partner is afraid of the other. You can book the free call on your own. What you tell me on your own is not passed to your partner without your agreement, except where someone's safety is at serious risk; I explain those limits on the free call. In your message, tell me the safest way and time to contact you. Video sessions from a shared home are not private if you could be overheard or your devices are checked. If you are in immediate danger, call 999.
If there is violence, threats or controlling behaviour, the National Domestic Abuse Helpline is free, day or night, on 0808 2000 247. The Men's Advice Line is on 0808 801 0327. If you are worried about your own behaviour towards a partner, the Respect Phoneline is on 0808 802 4040 (Monday to Friday, 10am to 5pm).
Free and low-cost support for Horsham
If a partner's drinking is part of the strain, Carers Support West Sussex supports people looking after someone who uses drugs or alcohol, and West Sussex Wellbeing has council-run support for family and friends. If either of you wants your own space as well, Horsham and Crawley Counselling Group CIC offers low-cost counselling on a sliding scale.
- Free NHS talking therapy (for one of you)NHS West Sussex Talking Therapies – North Team01403 620434Free NHS talking therapy for anxiety, low mood and related difficulties. You can refer yourself, with no GP referral needed.
- If drinking or drug use is part of itWest Sussex Drug & Alcohol Wellbeing Network (DAWN)0330 128 1113Run by Change Grow Live. Free and confidential.
Private counselling with me can run alongside any of these; you do not have to choose one or the other.
If you need urgent help now
If you need help right now, please don't wait for a session.
In this area you can also text SUSSEX to 85258.
If you, or someone you live with, drink heavily every day, or take drugs such as benzodiazepines or GHB daily, do not stop suddenly without medical advice. Withdrawal can cause seizures and can be dangerous. Your GP or the local drug and alcohol service can arrange medically assisted withdrawal. Call 999 or go to A&E if someone in withdrawal is shaking visibly, unusually restless or agitated, confused, seeing or hearing things that are not there, or has a fit. For milder symptoms, such as a slight tremor or sweating, contact your GP or NHS 111 the same day (NHS guidance). Counselling works alongside medical support, not instead of it.
What people in Horsham ask before starting
Is there couples counselling in Horsham itself?
Not with me. My room is in Hove, so it's either the drive down, roughly 36 minutes, or secure video at home in Horsham. If staying in the town matters most, it's worth asking local services directly what they offer couples. With me, you start with a free 15-minute call and decide from there.
My partner commutes to London and gets home late. Can we still do this?
Probably, yes. Video removes the drive from Horsham to Hove, so a session can start once you're both home and settled, as long as there's a time free that suits you. We can look at what's available on the free call and choose a regular slot you can both actually keep.
Will anyone in Horsham know we're having couples counselling?
Not from me. What you bring stays confidential, within the usual professional limits around serious risk. The room is in Hove, well away from the school gate and the Carfax, and on video nobody sees you arrive anywhere. Whether you tell friends or family is entirely up to the two of you.
Is there free support in Horsham if drinking is causing problems between us?
Yes. Horsham District Wellbeing offers free alcohol reduction support for the person drinking, and anyone struggling with drink or drugs can call DAWN, Change Grow Live's countywide network, on 0330 128 1113. Couples sessions can run alongside either, looking at what it has done to you both.
How much do sessions cost, and is the first call free?
Sessions are £80 for 60 minutes, £100 for 90 minutes and £120 for 120 minutes, the same in person in Hove or by video. The first 15-minute call is free, with no obligation to book. There is no NHS referral needed to see me privately.
Make the first call, together or alone
When you feel ready, a short conversation is the easiest way to see whether we are a good fit. There is no obligation.