Ealing · online by video, with the Hove room for occasional sessions
Couples therapy and relationship counselling for Ealing
Maybe the same row flares up whenever you both get home to W5, or the rows have stopped and you pass in the hallway like lodgers; couples counselling gives you an hour to unpick it with someone who takes neither side. The room is in Hove, 93 minutes away by car, so sessions from Ealing run on secure video, together or from separate rooms. One of you can also begin alone.
The practical facts for Ealing
- Where sessions happen
- A private room at Intergen House, 65-67 Western Road, Hove BN3 2JQ, or secure video.
- From Ealing by car
- About 93 minutes with clear roads (76.1 miles); longer at busy times.
- Free NHS talking therapy (for one of you)
- Ealing Talking Therapies, 020 3830 5640
- Fees
- £80 for 60 minutes, £100 for 90, £120 for 120. The first 15-minute call is free.
- Registration
- BACP registered member, no. 109340 (check the register); UKCP student member in advanced psychotherapy training.
Two timetables, one front door in W5
Ealing makes it easy to lead separate lives under one roof.
One of you might be on the Elizabeth line towards Farringdon before seven while the other takes the District line from Ealing Common, and by the evening each of you has had a whole day the other knows nothing about. Film and television work around Ealing Studios can mean weeks of long days and then sudden quiet. If one of you is studying or teaching at the University of West London, term dates can set the household rhythm. Then there is caring: a parent who needs more help, or a child whose needs take every spare hour. Around all of it sits the cost of keeping a home in a major metropolitan centre. Few of these pressures are anyone's fault, yet they tend to come out as blame, silence or the same old row about who does what.
How couples sessions run from west London
Nobody is put on trial in these sessions, and I keep the airtime even between you. What I watch for is the pattern that keeps catching you both: one of you chasing closeness while the other retreats, perhaps, or a talk about bills in a major metropolitan centre turning into a judgement on who you each are. We slow it down enough to hear what is underneath. That might be exhaustion, fear about the future, grief neither of you has said out loud, or a sense of being alone inside the relationship. Sometimes one partner is caring for a relative in Ealing and the other feels shut out, and both are right. Drink can be part of it too, and then the partner who is anxious about it deserves backing in their own right, alongside the joint work in our sessions. If one of you won't come, the other can start alone and look at their part of the pattern. Joint sessions rely on each of you feeling safe with the other at home, so if you are scared of your partner at all, the domestic abuse safety information lower down comes first.
Pressures that follow Ealing couples home
Separate trains, separate days
Ealing Broadway sends trains east on three lines, and if your working days start and end at different hours, the only overlap may be tired and late.
Studio work and uneven hours
Long production days around Ealing Studios, then gaps between jobs, can leave one partner holding the household while the other is absent or anxious.
When one of you is caring
Looking after a parent or child can squeeze out time as a couple. Ealing Carers Hub supports unpaid carers in the borough alongside our sessions.
A partner's drink or drug use
If drink or drugs have crept into one of your lives, RISE family and friends support backs the anxious partner, and our sessions look at the strain on you as a couple.
If you are afraid of your partner
Couples counselling is not safe or suitable where one partner is afraid of the other. You can book the free call on your own. What you tell me on your own is not passed to your partner without your agreement, except where someone's safety is at serious risk; I explain those limits on the free call. In your message, tell me the safest way and time to contact you. Video sessions from a shared home are not private if you could be overheard or your devices are checked. If you are in immediate danger, call 999.
If there is violence, threats or controlling behaviour, the National Domestic Abuse Helpline is free, day or night, on 0808 2000 247. The Men's Advice Line is on 0808 801 0327. If you are worried about your own behaviour towards a partner, the Respect Phoneline is on 0808 802 4040 (Monday to Friday, 10am to 5pm).
Free and low-cost support for Ealing
Free services in the borough support each of you as individuals, and can run alongside couples sessions. Where one of you is uneasy about the other's drinking or drug use, Recovery Intervention Services Ealing runs RISE family and friends support. Ealing Carers Hub and Ealing Carers Partnership help a partner who has become an unpaid carer. If either of you is weighed down by anxiety or low mood, Ealing Talking Therapies takes self-referrals.
- Free NHS talking therapy (for one of you)Ealing Talking Therapies020 3830 5640Free NHS talking therapy for anxiety, low mood and related difficulties. You can refer yourself, with no GP referral needed.
- If drinking or drug use is part of itRISE (Recovery Intervention Services Ealing)0800 195 8100Run by Change Grow Live (lead provider). Free and confidential.
- Local organisationWest London MindMental health charity.
- Local organisationEaling Bereft Bereavement Support
- Local organisationMeadow House Hospice bereavement service
- Local organisationEACH Counselling and Support, Jasmine Project (Ealing, women)
If you need urgent help now
If you need help right now, please don't wait for a session.
Locally, the West London NHS Trust 24-hour mental health helpline (Single Point of Access) is on 0800 328 4444. Local drop-in crisis support: Circle (West London Mind children's crisis café) (check opening times before you go).
If you, or someone you live with, drink heavily every day, or take drugs such as benzodiazepines or GHB daily, do not stop suddenly without medical advice. Withdrawal can cause seizures and can be dangerous. Your GP or the local drug and alcohol service can arrange medically assisted withdrawal. Call 999 or go to A&E if someone in withdrawal is shaking visibly, unusually restless or agitated, confused, seeing or hearing things that are not there, or has a fit. For milder symptoms, such as a slight tremor or sweating, contact your GP or NHS 111 the same day (NHS guidance). Counselling works alongside medical support, not instead of it.
What people in Ealing ask before starting
Can we see a couples counsellor in person near Ealing?
In-person sessions are at Intergen House in Hove, about 93 minutes' drive from Ealing. For a couple, that's a big weekly commitment, so regular sessions from Ealing are much easier over secure video. If you'd both like to meet in one room at a key point, we can book a longer session in Hove and make the trip worthwhile.
Does couples therapy work if we join from two places?
It can work well. Each of you logs in from your own private space, one perhaps at home in Ealing and the other at a hotel or a friend's flat, and we all appear on one screen. Good headphones and reliable broadband make a difference. If shift patterns or studio schedules keep changing, we can agree a regular slot you can both reliably keep.
Are there free services for couples struggling in Ealing?
Ealing's free services see people singly, so each partner is welcome to draw on them while our joint sessions carry on. Ealing Talking Therapies, run by West London NHS Trust, accepts a call from either of you on 020 3830 5640 when worry or a flat mood has taken hold. For worry about a partner's drinking or drug use there is RISE family and friends support, and a partner who has taken on caring can lean on Ealing Carers Hub.
My partner won't come. Is it worth starting alone from Ealing?
Yes. Coming alone, you look at what you bring to the pattern: how you react as tension builds, what has been left unsaid, and the closeness you wish for. A shift in one person can change the whole dynamic, and partners sometimes join later. If you feel afraid of your partner, please read the domestic abuse safety information on this page first.
How much do sessions cost, and is the first call free?
Sessions are £80 for 60 minutes, £100 for 90 minutes and £120 for 120 minutes, the same in person in Hove or by video. The first 15-minute call is free, with no obligation to book. There is no NHS referral needed to see me privately.
A first phone call from W5, together or alone
When you feel ready, a short conversation is the easiest way to see whether we are a good fit. There is no obligation.