Harrow · online by video, with the Hove room for occasional sessions
Bereavement and grief counselling for Harrow
If someone you love has died and Harrow feels different now, from the walk past their road in Kenton to the empty place at family gatherings, grief counselling offers a steady weekly hour in which to talk about them. There are no stages to complete and no date to be over it. We meet on secure video, because Hove is 97 minutes away.
If you are thinking about ending your life, call 999 or the Samaritans free on 116 123, day or night. More urgent help is on this page.
The practical facts for Harrow
- Where sessions happen
- A private room at Intergen House, 65-67 Western Road, Hove BN3 2JQ, or secure video.
- From Harrow by car
- About 97 minutes with clear roads (76.4 miles); longer at busy times.
- Free bereavement helpline
- Cruse Bereavement Support helpline, 0808 808 1677
- Fees
- £80 for 60 minutes, £100 for 90, £120 for 120. The first 15-minute call is free.
- Registration
- BACP registered member, no. 109340 (check the register); UKCP student member in advanced psychotherapy training.
Grieving between Northwick Park, the hill and family overseas
A death in Harrow often leaves a trail of places behind it.
There may have been weeks of visiting Northwick Park Hospital on Watford Road, the car park and corridors now part of the memory. In a borough where more than half of residents were born outside the UK, grief can also stretch across countries: a parent who died overseas while you were here, a funeral followed on a phone screen, relatives arriving and leaving within a fortnight, and then a quiet house. Families mourn in different ways, with prayers, gatherings, set days of remembrance or a firm expectation to stay strong, and those customs can comfort you and weigh on you at the same time. Perhaps you are now sorting a parent's home in North Harrow or Harrow Weald, or passing St Mary's Church on the hill where you said goodbye. If you cared for them for years, days that were full of appointments may suddenly feel shapeless.
What we do with the hour after a death
Grief moves in its own pattern rather than a straight line, and our sessions follow it. Some weeks you may want to tell me who they were, the ordinary habits and phrases that nobody else mentions now. Other weeks it may be the harder feelings: anger at them or at the people who looked after them, guilt about something said or left unsaid, or relief that a long illness is finished, followed by guilt about the relief. If your relationship with them was difficult, that grief is just as real and often more tangled. A sudden death can leave the ground feeling unsteady for a long while, and an expected one may mean you began grieving well before the end. Where someone has died by suicide, we can sit with the questions without forcing answers. If a drink has started filling the evenings since, you can say so honestly, as I am in recovery myself, and Via Harrow on 0300 303 2868 offers free specialist drug and alcohol support across the borough too. The pace is yours, and the aim is a way of living with the loss that sits comfortably with your family's customs, whether those are rooted in Harrow or overseas.
Moments when grief catches up in Harrow
After the wards at Northwick Park
If the final weeks were spent visiting Northwick Park Hospital, driving along Watford Road can bring everything back. Sessions can make space for what stayed with you from that time.
When they died far from Harrow
When a parent or sibling dies abroad, distance and missed goodbyes can complicate grief. We can talk about the farewell you had, or the one you never got to say.
Life after years of caring
Harrow Carers supports people who have looked after a relative, and when caring ends with a death, your days and your sense of purpose can empty out at once.
Older and suddenly on your own
Losing a partner later in life can bring loneliness quickly. The Good Neighbour Reconnection Club meets monthly at the Seva Care Cafe in Harrow Recreation Ground for older people wanting company.
Free bereavement support for Harrow
Free bereavement support in the borough includes Bereavement Care (Harrow and Hillingdon) and St Luke's Hospice bereavement support for Harrow and Brent, alongside Cruse Bereavement Support nationally. If low mood or anxiety has settled in since the death, Harrow Talking Therapies accepts self-referrals. Harrow Samaritans will listen at any hour, and our sessions can run beside any of these.
- Free bereavement helplineCruse Bereavement Support helpline0808 808 1677Free, from trained volunteers. Open Monday and Wednesday to Friday 9.30am to 5pm, Tuesday 1pm to 8pm.
- Free NHS talking therapyHarrow Talking Therapies020 8515 5015Free NHS talking therapy for low mood or anxiety that has settled in after a loss. You can refer yourself, with no GP referral needed.
- If drinking or drug use is part of itVia Harrow0300 303 2868Free and confidential.
- Local organisationMind in HarrowMental health charity.
- Local organisationSt Luke's Hospice (Harrow and Brent): Bereavement Support
- Local organisationHarrow Carers
If someone at home is hurting, threatening or controlling you, the National Domestic Abuse Helpline is free, day or night, on 0808 2000 247.
If you need urgent help now
If you need help right now, please don't wait for a session.
Locally, the CNWL Mental Health Single Point of Access is on 0800 0234 650.
What people in Harrow ask before starting
My dad died at Northwick Park a few weeks ago. Is it too early to see a grief counsellor?
There's no correct time. You might want to talk while the funeral and paperwork are still under way, or months later once other people have stopped asking how you are. Either makes sense. Book the free 15-minute call when it feels right, tell me as much or as little about your dad as you like, and I'll let you know which weekly times are open.
Is there free bereavement support in Harrow?
Yes. Bereavement Care (Harrow and Hillingdon) and the bereavement support at St Luke's Hospice, which serves Harrow and Brent, both work locally, and the Cruse national helpline is on 0808 808 1677. You can approach any of them yourself. Our weekly sessions can sit beside theirs, or follow on later if you want to keep talking with one person over a longer stretch.
Can grief counselling from Harrow work over video?
Yes. With the room in Hove 97 minutes away by car, weekly grief sessions from Harrow take place on secure video. Your own home can be an easier place to cry, to hold a photograph while you talk, or to sit quietly once we finish, without a long drive back. Should meeting face to face matter at some point, a longer session at Intergen House is possible.
My mother died in another country and I couldn't be there. Can I talk about that with a counsellor in Harrow?
Yes, as much as you need: the phone calls, the funeral you followed from a distance, grieving with relatives across time zones, and the guilt or anger that can come with not being there. There is no right way to mourn from far away, and your family's customs are welcome in the conversation. Should grieving from a distance ever make you feel you cannot carry on, the urgent help box on this page lists who to call.
How much do sessions cost, and is the first call free?
Sessions are £80 for 60 minutes, £100 for 90 minutes and £120 for 120 minutes, the same in person in Hove or by video. The first 15-minute call is free, with no obligation to book. There is no NHS referral needed to see me privately.
Talk about them, whenever you're ready, from Harrow
When you feel ready, a short conversation is the easiest way to see whether we are a good fit. There is no obligation.