Guildford · online by video, with the Hove room for occasional sessions
Bereavement and grief counselling for Guildford
When someone close to you has died, grief can arrive in forms nobody warned you about: anger, guilt, relief, or a tiredness that sleep doesn't touch. From Guildford, our bereavement sessions take place over secure video, moving at your speed, and nobody is measuring where you ought to have got to by now.
If you are thinking about ending your life, call 999 or the Samaritans free on 116 123, day or night. More urgent help is on this page.
The practical facts for Guildford
- Where sessions happen
- A private room at Intergen House, 65-67 Western Road, Hove BN3 2JQ, or secure video.
- From Guildford by car
- About 70 minutes with clear roads (44.3 miles); longer at busy times.
- By train
- From Guildford, change at Gatwick Airport for trains towards Brighton and Hove.
- Free bereavement helpline
- Cruse Bereavement Support helpline, 0808 808 1677
- Fees
- £80 for 60 minutes, £100 for 90, £120 for 120. The first 15-minute call is free.
- Registration
- BACP registered member, no. 109340 (check the register); UKCP student member in advanced psychotherapy training.
The places in Guildford that still hold them
Grief in Guildford often has an address. It might be the ward at the Royal Surrey County Hospital where you sat through the last weeks, and the stretch of Egerton Road you now take a longer route to avoid. It might be the towpath along the River Wey Navigation, or the walk up Pewley Down you always did together, which feels impossible alone and impossible to give up. If you commute, it can mean going back to London on the fast train within days of the funeral, holding yourself together at a desk all day and coming apart somewhere between Woking and home. A student at the University of Surrey may hear the news far from family, then sit through a seminar where nobody knows. And if you looked after the person for years, the house in Merrow or Burpham can feel strangely quiet, with whole days that used to be shaped around their care.
Grief without a timetable
Bereavement counselling with me follows no set of stages, because grief rarely moves in a straight line. Some weeks we may talk about the person: who they were, what you miss, what you wish you'd said. Other weeks it is the feelings that are harder to admit to, such as anger at them for going, guilt about a decision near the end, or relief after a long illness, and the shame that relief can bring. If the relationship was difficult, there is room for that too, since you can grieve a parent and still be angry with them. A death by suicide often leaves questions that may never fully settle, and we can stay with them without forcing an answer. You set the pace, and an hour can be quiet when quiet is what you need. Sometimes grief and drinking become tangled, with an extra glass each night to get to sleep, or a ritual you shared that now feels like a way of keeping them close. We can look at that gently and honestly, and if you want specialist help with the drinking, i-access is Surrey's free drug and alcohol service. Because I've been through recovery too, you can tell me how much you've been drinking without softening it. What we work towards is a way to carry the loss alongside the rest of your life, at whatever speed that happens.
Losses that come with a Guildford life
Last weeks at the Royal Surrey
If the person you've lost died at the Royal Surrey County Hospital, passing Egerton Road can bring it all back. We can talk through those last days, and what stays with you from them.
Back on the Waterloo train too soon
Compassionate leave ends long before grief does. If you're commuting into London again and holding it in all day, an evening session gives the grief somewhere to go.
A loss back home during term
Losing someone while you study at the University of Surrey can leave you torn between your family and your course. Video means sessions carry on whether you're on campus or back home.
When years of caring stop
After looking after someone, their death can take your routine and your role along with them. If you're still caring for another relative, Action for Carers Surrey supports carers across the county.
Free bereavement support for Guildford
Cruse Bereavement Support has local services for South West Surrey and the Surrey North Area, as well as its national helpline on 0808 808 1677, and private counselling can run beside any of them. When a loss leaves lasting anxiety or low mood, Guildford residents can refer themselves at no charge to Mind Matters Surrey, which runs NHS Talking Therapies countywide. Guildford Samaritans, the town's own branch, is there when you need someone to listen.
- Free bereavement helplineCruse Bereavement Support helpline0808 808 1677Free, from trained volunteers. Open Monday and Wednesday to Friday 9.30am to 5pm, Tuesday 1pm to 8pm.
- Free NHS talking therapyMind Matters Surrey0300 330 5450Free NHS talking therapy for low mood or anxiety that has settled in after a loss. You can refer yourself, with no GP referral needed.
- If drinking or drug use is part of iti-access0300 222 5932Free and confidential.
- Local organisationCatalyst Support
- Local organisationAction for Carers Surrey
- Local organisationOakleaf EnterpriseLocal mental health charity.
If someone at home is hurting, threatening or controlling you, the National Domestic Abuse Helpline is free, day or night, on 0808 2000 247.
If you need urgent help now
If you need help right now, please don't wait for a session.
Locally, the Surrey and Borders Partnership NHS FT Mental Health Crisis Helpline is on 0800 915 4644. Local drop-in crisis support: Guildford Safe Haven (check opening times before you go).
What people in Guildford ask before starting
Where can I get free help with grief in Guildford while I wait for counselling?
Yes. Cruse Bereavement Support covers the area through its South West Surrey and Surrey North Area services, and its national helpline is 0808 808 1677. If the loss has left you with low mood or anxiety, you can refer yourself to Mind Matters Surrey on 0300 330 5450. Weekly video sessions with me can run in parallel with Cruse or Mind Matters Surrey, for as many or as few weeks as feel useful.
The funeral in Guildford was only last month. Is it too early to start grief counselling?
It is never too early or too late. Wanting to talk a few weeks in is as reasonable as waiting until a year or more later, when everyone around you seems to assume you've moved on. Either is fine. On a free 15-minute call you can tell me briefly about the person you've lost, and I'll be honest about how long until a weekly video slot opens up.
Can I have bereavement counselling in person in Guildford, or is it by video?
My one room is in Hove, about 70 minutes' drive from Guildford, so weekly grief counselling from there happens by secure video. That lets you talk from your own home, with tissues to hand and no long drive afterwards. Should you want to meet face to face at some point, perhaps near an anniversary, we can book an extended session at Intergen House.
I live in Guildford and feel more angry than sad since my mum died. Is that part of grief?
Anger often comes with grief, whether it's aimed at the person who died, at family, at the way things ended, or at yourself. It says nothing about how much you loved her. In counselling you can say what feels unsayable elsewhere, without anyone being hurt by hearing it. Should the anger or the loss ever bring thoughts of not wanting to live, the Surrey and Borders crisis line on 0800 915 4644 answers at any hour, and the urgent help box here lists other numbers.
How much do sessions cost, and is the first call free?
Sessions are £80 for 60 minutes, £100 for 90 minutes and £120 for 120 minutes, the same in person in Hove or by video. The first 15-minute call is free, with no obligation to book. There is no NHS referral needed to see me privately.
Talk about them, at your own pace
When you feel ready, a short conversation is the easiest way to see whether we are a good fit. There is no obligation.