Bermondsey · online by video, with the Hove room for occasional sessions
Bereavement and grief counselling for Bermondsey
After a death, the stalls on Maltby Street and the crowds at London Bridge carry on as if nothing has happened, which can feel unbearable when your world has stopped. Bereavement counselling gives you a regular, unhurried hour to talk about the person and the loss. My room is in Hove, a 96-minute drive away, so from Bermondsey we'd usually meet by secure video, with Hove open to you if you'd rather sit together.
If you are thinking about ending your life, call 999 or the Samaritans free on 116 123, day or night. More urgent help is on this page.
The practical facts for Bermondsey
- Where sessions happen
- A private room at Intergen House, 65-67 Western Road, Hove BN3 2JQ, or secure video.
- From Bermondsey by car
- About 96 minutes with clear roads (53.3 miles); longer at busy times.
- Free bereavement helpline
- Cruse Bereavement Support helpline, 0808 808 1677
- Fees
- £80 for 60 minutes, £100 for 90, £120 for 120. The first 15-minute call is free.
- Registration
- BACP registered member, no. 109340 (check the register); UKCP student member in advanced psychotherapy training.
Grief in a neighbourhood that keeps moving
Loss in Bermondsey can arrive in very different settings.
It might come after weeks of visits to Guy's Hospital at London Bridge, after years of caring at home in a flat on one of the estates, or with no warning at all. For families with deep roots here, the death of a parent can also feel like losing a link to an older Bermondsey of leather, biscuits and warehouses, just as the Peek Frean site turns into Pearl Yard and new neighbours move in. If you came here for work, you may be grieving a parent who lived far away, and find yourself back at a desk near Tower Bridge within days, with few people around who knew them. Grief doesn't keep office hours. It can catch you in the queue at Maltby Street Market or on a walk along Shad Thames, in the middle of an ordinary Saturday.
Grieving at your own speed, by video from south-east London
There's no tidy sequence of stages to pass through, and no deadline after which grieving the person should have stopped. How fast we go is up to you. Some weeks you may want to talk about the person in detail, their voice and habits and the last conversations; other weeks you may need to talk about anything else. Sorrow is rarely the whole of what you feel. Anger at the family, the system or the person who died, guilt about what was said or left unsaid, and relief after a long illness all have room here, and none of them makes you a bad person. If the relationship was difficult, the grief can be tangled, and we can take that slowly. A death by suicide leaves questions few other losses raise, and in this part of London a specialist suicide bereavement service from SLaM and South East London Mind can stand beside our work. Sometimes grief and drinking start to wind together, a glass to get to sleep that turns into several, and with my own background in recovery we can look at that openly and without judgement. The loss stays yours; counselling offers a steady weekly place to carry it.
Kinds of loss we can work with
Years of caring, then quiet
If you looked after a parent or partner at home for years, the end of caring can leave a strange silence, and grief may include missing the role as well as the person.
Dementia and the long goodbye
Time and Talents runs a twice-monthly group for people caring for someone with dementia across Rotherhithe, Surrey Quays and Bermondsey, where loss can begin long before a death.
After a death by suicide
SLaM and South East London Mind jointly run a specialist suicide bereavement service for this corner of London, and weekly video counselling from Bermondsey can run in parallel with it.
Older and on your own now
For Irish-born or Irish-descent people over 55, the Southwark Irish Pensioners Project offers befriending and drop-ins, which can ease the loneliness after losing a husband or wife.
Free bereavement support for Bermondsey
Alongside private sessions, Cruse Bereavement Support, which Southwark Council signposts, runs a national helpline. After a suicide, SLaM and South East London Mind provide specialist help through their joint bereavement service, while Time and Talents sends befrienders to the homes of over-55s across Rotherhithe, Surrey Quays and Bermondsey. If low mood or anxiety settles in after the loss, Talking Therapies Southwark is the NHS service you can refer yourself to.
- Free bereavement helplineCruse Bereavement Support helpline0808 808 1677Free, from trained volunteers. Open Monday and Wednesday to Friday 9.30am to 5pm, Tuesday 1pm to 8pm.
- Free NHS talking therapyTalking Therapies Southwark020 3228 2194Free NHS talking therapy for low mood or anxiety that has settled in after a loss. You can refer yourself, with no GP referral needed.
- If drinking or drug use is part of itCGL Southwark020 3404 7699Run by Change Grow Live (CGL). Free and confidential.
- Local organisationSouthwark Wellbeing Hub
- Local organisationMobiliseSupport for carers.
- Local organisationSouthwark Irish Pensioners Project
If someone at home is hurting, threatening or controlling you, the National Domestic Abuse Helpline is free, day or night, on 0808 2000 247.
If you need urgent help now
If you need help right now, please don't wait for a session.
The South London NHS Mental Health Crisis Text Service (SLaM) is another option: WhatsApp 0303 330 1511 or text 80991.
What people in Bermondsey ask before starting
Where can I find bereavement counselling near Bermondsey?
My counselling room is in Hove, about 96 minutes' drive from Bermondsey, so grief counselling with me usually happens by secure video from your home. Now and then you might prefer the room itself, and the Thameslink route south from London Bridge makes an occasional hour or longer in Hove possible. For free help, Southwark Council points bereaved residents towards Cruse Bereavement Support, and a loss through suicide has its own dedicated South East London service.
Can I start grief counselling in Bermondsey before the funeral?
You can start whenever you feel you want to talk, whether that's in the first raw weeks or a long time later. Early sessions are often quiet and practical, a place to breathe between arrangements. After a short free consultation I offer the times I have open, so you won't be left on a waiting list while things are at their hardest.
Is there free bereavement support in Southwark if my loss was a suicide?
Yes. South East London Suicide Bereavement Service covers Southwark, a South London and Maudsley partnership with South East London Mind for those left behind after a suicide, and you're free to use it while seeing me. If the loss brings thoughts of ending your own life, the urgent help box here lists a South London NHS crisis text service on 80991.
My dad died at Guy's after a long illness and I mostly feel relief. Is that wrong?
Relief often turns up in grief after a long illness, alongside love rather than in place of it. You may be relieved that their suffering has ended, and that the hospital visits and the waiting are over, and then feel guilty about it. In counselling we can make room for all of that without hurrying you towards a tidier feeling, by video from Bermondsey or now and then in Hove.
How much do sessions cost, and is the first call free?
Sessions are £80 for 60 minutes, £100 for 90 minutes and £120 for 120 minutes, the same in person in Hove or by video. The first 15-minute call is free, with no obligation to book. There is no NHS referral needed to see me privately.
Talk about the person you've lost, from Bermondsey
When you feel ready, a short conversation is the easiest way to see whether we are a good fit. There is no obligation.